Stop, Look & Listen

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Side note: My title makes me want to yell out in a cheer from high school! (Dedicated to my Wolf Pack!)

I get so annoyed with myself. When friends are stressed, heartbroken, unnerved, or frustrated with life, my heart literally aches for them and I can’t seem to get it off my mind. The motherly instinct kicks in (and I don’t even have kids yet!! Good grief!) and I just want to fix everything. I hate when I can’t help people, or fix problems. It’s the same reason why I hate when people are disappointed or mad at me, and I have no control over changing their opinion. Why is it that we have such deep bonds like this for our dearest friends and feel helpless when we can’t fix the pain, or why we go to any length to help those in need? But more so, why don’t we trust each other enough to be completely open and honest so those of us that want to fix it can pinpoint the problem!?

Simple answer. We’re human. Past experiences of others destroying our capability to trust others. The thought that others are judging us for being “weak” when pouring our hearts out. Because we have become a selfish public without genuine care or the art of listening. And because it becomes humorous when we struggle with ignorance. If you saw a man repeatedly running into a wall until he was a bloody pulp, after awhile it would make you laugh because it was so absurd. For this exact reason, we throw the wall up to relieve ourselves from embarrassment. It is unfortunate that we build walls so high and tough, that few people know how to break through. No one wants to get hurt, but life isn’t about being safe.

I tend to forgive people far too often and easily that those who’ve hurt me before have repeated the offense (so yes, I’m that man with blood running down my face sometimes). But for the most part, I can’t hold grudges and I try to give people the benefit of the doubt. Sure, people might say I get “run over” frequently, but I’d rather trust that people have some kind of honor before I dismiss them. We will ALL make mistakes, and not accepting this fact adds to the ignorance of the human race.

Back to our friends. Sometimes the toughest people to crack are the ones that need it the most, which brings me back to my first point. My mind never stops thinking, which is HIGHLY exasperating. Thinking so much has often gotten myself into trouble, and I start to stress when I list out the projects I need to accomplish or the people I wish I could help. It’s like grasping for air when you’re at the bottom of the ocean. You never seem to get to the surface. Who can be successful like that?

You can’t. You have to learn to breathe underwater. Learn to put that never-ending list into priorities of the most important to the least important. Learn to tackle obstacles one at a time. Part of dealing with things, though, is finding those you trust dearly, who you know would never judge you for what you say or do, who you know will give you the best advice and not necessarily what you want to hear. It’s the hardest thing to let people into our hearts because we don’t want to get hurt, but a life of pushing people away is a life lived alone. A life you can’t share with anyone.

We all struggle with it, but if we embrace it, we may be able to make a difference in someone else’s life, including your own.

Don’t forget to care about those most important in your life and don’t forget to tell them. Learn to forgive. Learn to listen. Let people in.

“A friend is a hand that is always holding yours, no matter how close or far apart you may be. A friend is someone who is always there and will always, always care. A friend is a feeling of forever in the heart.”

Live boldly challenging status quo.

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