Saying goodbye to Peter Pan, Mrs. Doubtfire, the Genie, our friend - Robin Williams

This is something I wrote the day I went to the Doubtfire house in Pacific Heights here in San Francisco. I found it again, and thought the words mean just as much now as back in Aug. '14...

I found myself drawn to say goodbye to a friend that never knew me, but was a significant part of our lives.

It's tragic that someone so full of life, love and laughter felt so empty and overcome by dark demons.

We all find ourselves in darkness blinded by sadness, frustration, guilt and doubt. Yet, it's how we crawl, climb or sprint out of the shadows and into the light that keep us moving forward.

It's a reminder that life is short, family is important, friends are essential.


Don't hold back. Take every opportunity to inspire, challenge, grow, and love. You never know when it may be your last and God calls you home.

What will you leave behind?

Regrets or memories?

Boldly challenging status quo.

Time and Peace

Time is everything.

It's the allotted amount of existence we have to accomplish everything our little hearts desire. It's also the burden that weighs down on our hearts when we feel like there's not enough of it.

The act of time can also be either a beautiful canvas when every swoop, swish and flick aligns perfectly for a spectacular masterpiece. It can also mean disaster when the everything wrong collides to create a terrible catastrophe. Maybe, just maybe, the right paints, brushes, and strokes come together, but a different sketch is drawn that takes you on a different course all together away from comfort and peace.

Why is it that some depictions are exactly what you intended, while others become silent, foreign ships that pass each other unknowingly in the night?

I'm not sure why quotes are incredibly awe-inspiring lately, but I read another quote today that actually brought me to tears:

"You can never be at peace until you find peace within yourself."

30 Regrets Not to Have in My Next 30 Years

I’ve spent precious time with my Papa Wilde, either on road trips or sitting on his back porch reminiscing about the past, talking hopefully about the future, but always with a voice of reason and caution. Now, as a man of leisure, he says, he has a lot of time to reflect and he’s spent some of that time wishing he had made other choices – been a better father, husband, etc. I wish he wouldn’t spend time regretting, but in fact, spend more time cherishing the great memories he did make and all the new ones yet to come.

Since my grandma passed about now almost 14 years ago, (man, that crushes my soul thinking about it), I think he wishes he would have made more of the time he’d had with her. She was, in fact, a beautiful, selfless, loving person who, to this day, is everything I hope to be someday. I don’t think she had a bad bone in her body, and even if someone told me she wasn’t perfect, I wouldn’t believe them ;)

The reason for this blog is because you never know when God will call you home. You shouldn’t exhaust precious moments wishing you had done things differently. To deflect that initially, you have to put the right people and plans first, but be willing to change course for the better if life sends you on a new adventure.

My Papa’s reflections, as sad as it makes me when I think about it, are valuable to me - to remind me not to have those regrets later, to remember to value the right people and things in life.

I’ll be thirty at the end of this year. Holy shit. I can’t believe it. Before I get there, here are 30 regrets I don’t want to have in my next 30 years.

1. Spending too little time with the right people. – Sooner or later, you just want to be around the people who make you smile. So today, spend time with those who help you love yourself more. And remember, the people you take for granted today may be the only ones you need tomorrow. Never be too busy to make time for those who matter most.
2. Not making your loved ones smile more often. – The most beautiful thing is to see a person you love smile, and even more beautiful is knowing that you are the reason behind it.

When life flashes before your eyes, will it be worth watching?

It's been awhile since we last met. I moved to San Francisco, traveled to a few new cities, my little sister got married, and I graduated with my MBA. I've met many new friends and spent precious time with old ones.

My dog, Blaze, and I are still thick as thieves hiking, backpacking, running, and swimming until we have no further energy to give.

OK, OK. Confession. I certainly get to a point of exhaustion sometimes, whereas Blaze is still ready to ascend another mountain or sprint through more trees. Rude, I tell you. No reason to show off like that in front of your owner and embarrass her! At least I have another being willing to keep up with me on a moment’s notice.

Anyway, I sit here on the beach watching the sun go down behind the Golden Gate Bridge with only a few crazy souls in the "cold" San Francisco winter wind. By no means is it Chicago weather, but we Californians are pansies. We can't deal with cold to save our lives.

It's dark and quiet, almost too quiet for this city. The water is calm and smooth; not at all fierce and threatening. I can’t hear any traffic, any voices, or really any noise pollution apart from my soft music and ocean waves.

I have finally jumped on the Spotify bandwagon after years of stubborn, brand-loyal me couldn't walk away from Pandora. This is relevant because my playlist is The Most Beautiful Songs in the World. Add calm waves and a light cool breeze, it's the makings of a reflective, thought-filled evening.

Pause. My fingers are about to fall off from the cold. It's 55°F and I've become a wuss. Too bad I don't have logs to make a beach fire. It's probably for the better as I’d get too comfortable and wake up to cops or bums telling me to get to steppin’.

Tough Mudder Symbolizes Life's Adventure

I've been in love with challenge courses, but the ultimate big daddy is Tough Mudder.

Tough Mudder, to me, symbolizes life - extreme, full of crazy obstacles, some times you sweat and others you freeze, you may be in over your head and loose your grip, but if you surround yourself with solid-minded, inspirational, entertaining, high-achieving, supportive people, you’ll not only enjoy the journey, but you’ll come out on top. I crave the challenge and I’m not afraid to get dirty. My personality and drive perfectly fits the Tough Mudder Credo and I can't tell you how excited I get when I see a fellow Mudder proudly wearing the TM threads!

I’m currently surrounded by the youthful embrace of individualism and teamwork, a lot like my experience of Tough Mudder. It’s absolutely true that the eclectic and electric environment is a lifestyle. I’ve worked in stuffy environments, and who gets excited to wake up and go to that? I love to work with people who are driven and charismatic that may either love what I love or introduce me to new things. I believe a life surrounded by people who not only challenge you to go outside your comfort zone, but also support your endeavors is essential to a life of fun and fulfillment.

Protecting this type of environment is so important because it allows open minds, creative thinking, and bold moves. Giving people a platform to share ideas and own them, gives them the power to shine, but also helps the company to succeed. Individually, we can achieve what we set our minds to, but with the force of many heads together, a small idea can become reality and beyond. I fully embrace this lifestyle with flare and vigor.

Tough Mudder is my IV, shooting me up with essential elements of excitement, challenges and an exhilarating story to tell.

Live tough by boldly challenging status quo.

The Key to Success is to Out-Hustle Everyone

I won't take credit for this quote, but I absolutely believe in it. A friend of mine saw this and sent it to me because the article reminded him of me. What a compliment, right?!

I strive to kick ass no matter where I am and it's usually a positive thing, until I'm on the same playing field as others. At work or in school, people find me as this super threat because I work my butt off and typically, no matter what anyone does or says, I keep at it at a supernova speed. Well, I'm sorry to say, maybe I am a threat. No, I don't have super powers (if I did, I'd want to fly!), I'm not crazy (yet), and no, I don't go all out to throw it in your face. I don't boast about my wins, but I will continue to work hard to reach my next bench mark.

When life gives you lemons, bite ‘em!

When life gives you lemons, bite ‘em and enjoy the sour taste as it drains down your throat. Next time, you’ll be better equipped to deal with it, even though it’ll still be hardcore painful.

Sometimes, the toughest situations that make you grind your teeth and make you want to cry in frustration are typically the ones that shape who you become in life. If you easily stride through life without obstacles, then you aren’t putting yourself out there and you aren’t really living. I’ve found myself in countless situations where there was a solid fork in the road...AND for some reason, I always choose the Amazon jungle. Luckily, I know how to use a machete to get through the toughest of terrain.

Time Spent with Family is the BEST Time Ever

Well overdue too, I have to say the weekend I spent with my cousin, Hailey, was some of the best memories I’ve had in Phoenix yet!

Background: The Crowe family lives on the San Juan Islands in the most Northwest region of the States. My family used to camp there every summer, and when my grandparents lived in Washington, I’d see them a few more times than just Christmas. However, now that we’re all getting older and meeting together only happens once a year in December, it gets tough!

I have said before, family is the BEST gift I could ask for. I know what it’s like for family not to care, spend time with you, and ignore you, so I’ve made it my mission to be a part of my cousins’, Hailey and Bjerre, lives. Hailey is now a whopping 15-year-old and Bjerre is a 4-year-old turning 15 :)

Hails, or more affectionately known as Booger, and I try to stay in touch as much as possible. Facebook, phone calls, texting, you name it! She’s called me when friends are evil to her, she confides in me about her dreams, among other things. I know she looks up to me, which gives me that much more pride and joy to be there for her....and let’s face it, keep myself in line!

Finding a Meaningful, Tangible Purpose

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How do you find a purpose in things that aren’t tangible? I’ve found that question tough to answer in a career that’s ever-changing. Not only do I not know what I want to do when I grow up, I feel like I can’t find my footing to even propel from.

For me, tangible accomplishments are a big deal. I know I work hard, but typically, I find myself being “too much” that it becomes a negative energy. Unfortunately, I don’t really know how to dial down my intensity. I don’t know how to communicate to other people that I’m not out for their positions or jobs. I’m sure the way I attack life is a bit off-putting because I work my butt off for what I want or do. I’m a threat to people who can just casually go about their days. Sadly, I find those kind of people frustrating - so much so that they suck the life out of me!

I think the biggest energy suck is not having a tangible, meaningful purpose or goal. I’ve had to step back and refocus myself - some of it at work, but much of it in my personal life. I’m so much more satisfied overall when I workout in the mornings. Giving myself goals like beating my last half-marathon time, finding human marks on the mountain I’m going to pass, and surrounding myself with other crazy fitness freaks. Since I know that, I’m that much more fulfilled when I stick with at least that.

What Gets You All Jacked Up About Life?

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It’s about time. I’ve been in beautiful Arizona for 455 days, or about 15 months. I’ve more or less found my groove with work, love being a student again, and found a bunch of odd things to do around the city (I mean suburbia) of Phoenix. These first few months can be compared to the first year of a relationship: you’re a bit uneasy, posing a little bit to morph to what the other likes, and put on a smile when things bother you after you subtly communicate the issue.

Let’s be real. When do I ever sit in the corner and let life pass before me? Never. Yet, I have morphed a bit to what the majority of people like to do around me. Going out every once in awhile is quite awesome, but when I’m surrounded by people that ONLY do that - I start to get bored. Like I said in my last blog, I’ve identified my missing links. It may sound cliché, but COME ON PEOPLE! We only live once.

What about you? Do you feel fulfilled with the life you’re living? What do you wish you could do, but just don’t? You could be working for a fantastic company you couldn’t even dream of, surrounded by some pretty entertaining people, living a comfortable life.

Continuing the Tradition of a Full Plate

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Moving to Phoenix has been such a blessing. I practically jumped head first into a sea of opportunities left and right, not knowing when to stop or say no. Those closest to me know that's exactly how I like it – a full calendar with her hands in everything.

Working for Yelp with wonderful people I can connect with on different levels is something I was definitely missing in Nebraska, and really, even before then. I’m surrounded by intelligent, forward-thinking, entertaining, and constant-strivers-to-be-better people. I have never been as awestruck by the caliber of so many people working for one company as I am with my coworkers at Yelp. Everyone helps everyone succeed. It’s not a blood bath of ignorant, self-serving vampires whom I have worked with in almost every capacity of my past. OK, minus the fangs. I’ve made so many great memories (among them being annihilated by a swarm of Africanized Killer Bees on Camelback Mountain) with so many more to come.

Spring Break Trip to Dallas

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Better late than never, right?

Based on my M.O., nothing should surprise you. Five weeks ago was Spring Break in Curtis (my little 600 person WITH students town, an hour away from any sort of mass civilization) and I was stuck here, all alone, with zero students. I had a few projects to do for NCTA, and during the evenings, I worked on my personal portfolio. I watched so many movies I almost don’t ever want to see another again. Almost.

Two students came back early to work at a bull sale from Thursday through Monday of break. Well, after a day, they were told they weren’t needed during the weekend. I joked about going to Dallas Thursday night and didn’t think anything of it. Friday rolled around and I finished all of my week’s projects and started craving sushi, so I asked the guys if they wanted to go after their work was done.

On my way to North Platte (for those of you who don’t know, I live an hour away from any kind of civilization), I got the itch. The itch to go to Dallas. By the time I was halfway, I stopped and asked the guys if they wanted to go to Dallas. Seriously go to Dallas! I’m not sure if they really thought I was serious, but Jed reluctantly and Matt excitedly said yes! So I turned around, packed my bags, and waited for the guys to get home. They knocked on my door, and as I exuberantly jumped up to open it, their faces were full of shock, uncertainty, and unease. Not sure if that was because I was as excited as a little child in a candy store, but let’s pretend that wasn’t the case.

50 Lists to Write to Lift Your Spirits OR to Simply Just Think About

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I love lists. I'd forget my head half the time if it wasn't attached!  If I don't write things down, I forget (thanks Dad). And then I feel extremely empowered when I finish a task and blissfully scratch it off my list. Then there are times when I write as a form of thinking, brainstorming, processing, reflecting. Sometimes getting everything out on paper puts me at ease when my mind is racing.

So when you have those times, or if you just feel like reflecting, come back to this list. You never know how your answers will change over time, and which ones don't. Have fun!

List as many as you can:

1. People who have influenced or inspired you
2. Things you are grateful for
3. Places you have been
4. Places you want to go
5. Books you’ve read

100 Things I Learned About Nebraska or What It Has Taught Me

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1. Huskers or Bust.
2. “Farmers” grow crops. “Ranchers” raise cattle. “Trucks” are semis. “Pickups” are the things most people drive. 
3. Farmers never get tax refund checks.
4. Slow life is comfortable. Big cities are normally unnerving.
5. Many have never been farther than 100-200 miles from home, let alone in a plane.
6. Can't stand to be indoors.
7. Always willing to help. Even with the not-so-fun jobs.
8. Dogs are house hold commodities. Cats are a given (outside) for mousing purposes.
9. Small animal 4-H is a joke. Livestock showing is their art.
10. Can start driving at 13.
11. Beer is always available after a day of work.
12. To gain respect fast, don't be afraid to get dirt under your fingernails. Eating a fresh rocky mountain oyster does the trick too.

Stop, Look & Listen

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Side note: My title makes me want to yell out in a cheer from high school! (Dedicated to my Wolf Pack!)

I get so annoyed with myself. When friends are stressed, heartbroken, unnerved, or frustrated with life, my heart literally aches for them and I can’t seem to get it off my mind. The motherly instinct kicks in (and I don’t even have kids yet!! Good grief!) and I just want to fix everything. I hate when I can’t help people, or fix problems. It’s the same reason why I hate when people are disappointed or mad at me, and I have no control over changing their opinion. Why is it that we have such deep bonds like this for our dearest friends and feel helpless when we can’t fix the pain, or why we go to any length to help those in need? But more so, why don’t we trust each other enough to be completely open and honest so those of us that want to fix it can pinpoint the problem!?

Simple answer. We’re human. Past experiences of others destroying our capability to trust others. The thought that others are judging us for being “weak” when pouring our hearts out. Because we have become a selfish public without genuine care or the art of listening. And because it becomes humorous when we struggle with ignorance. If you saw a man repeatedly running into a wall until he was a bloody pulp, after awhile it would make you laugh because it was so absurd. For this exact reason, we throw the wall up to relieve ourselves from embarrassment. It is unfortunate that we build walls so high and tough, that few people know how to break through. No one wants to get hurt, but life isn’t about being safe.

Strength in a Weakness

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I used to hate writing. English was my least favorite subject and I dreaded writing multiple page papers. My love during grade school was dissecting the unknown of science, but most of all living a life to better the lives of those around me. The same still exists. Every day is an adventure waiting for me to take hold and discover its meaning. Each presents opportunities to influence lives and cherish the memories created.

I may not articulate my thoughts perfectly or use the most intelligent words, but I’m not trying to impress you with my words. I’m trying to spark something inside you. Maybe one of my blogs will take ahold of you, or awaken some part of you that’s been dead. Maybe they’ll influence you to pay good things forward instead of hold a grudge about someone who’s done you wrong. Maybe you won’t agree with me, or maybe you will. I don’t mind either way. These are my thoughts. I don’t want to think for you. I don’t want to puppet your life. But I do want you to challenge yourself to be the best you can be. Not to give yourself excuses. Those are worthless. Life will have many obstacles and it’s how you overcome them that makes you who you are or who you want to become.

My Epiphany

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While I was applying for grad school, the same question I kept getting asked was something along the lines of “What are your long term career goals?” Well, crap! I had no idea what to say because I haven’t figured that out yet. I wrote about some compilation of ideas between reaching out, collegiate success for others, technology or retail industries, and making a difference and non-profit work. The goals changed depending on the day I was writing my application essays.

After I filled out double digits of applications to top universities across the world, I started thinking I’d enjoy international event planning. Planning large entertainment events across the world would be such a FUN career! A former professor of mine does just that which is where I got the idea. But how do I get into that?

I started looking into headquarters of restaurants, resorts, golf tournaments, retail stores, travel agencies, and every other headquarters in between that could possibly get me to that overall goal. (I’m pretty sure once I move to Phoenix, every agency will know who Britni Freiboth is because they all have my resume!)

But then I started thinking about my essays and what the underlying messages were that I was trying to imply. I thoroughly enjoy the satisfaction of putting others before myself in any situation. However, I delight in fighting for a good cause to raise money whether I participate in running activities, or creating my own charity events. I believe I was born to fight for those who cannot or will not fight for what is ethically right. I am a firm believer in what is popular is not always right, but what is right is not always popular, and I live my life based on influencing others to choose based on ethical values. I have a genuine, passionate, competitive, active personality, which is a deadly combination. Once I set my mind on a goal, I will achieve it no matter what obstacles fall in my way. If I can teach others or help others achieve their goals along the way, I will have succeeded.

You Never Know When You'll Be Inspired

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A week ago, I was in Vegas for the Miss America contest. No, I wasn't in it, but many people thought I should have been. Unfortunately, my talent is inspiring, mentoring, or leading people, along with my adventurous love for life. I guess I could request to hold the talent portion outside and skydive for my talent. :)

Want to see my Vegas pics? Click HERE.

How about random Vegas pics of us? Click HERE.

The whole week up until the main event, I walked all over Vegas, took the stairs at every chance I could instead of escalators, visited every casino/resort possible in the small amount we were there, and spent as little time sitting around as we could. A ridiculous amount of photos were taken along the way to capture the city's ambience and life. I can honestly say I never gambled. I was so impressed with how much there was to do in Vegas that I didn't think twice about not throwing money away. Well, on gambling anyway.

The surprising truth about what motivates us

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This may be 10 minutes long, but I promise you'll enjoy this! What a great way to scrunch in A LOT of awesome information!

Live boldly challenging status quo!

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Helping Others By Telling Your Story

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I think the most humble and selfless act in life is to tell your story to help others. Whether that's to express the pain you went through to hopefully save others or enable those who've been through the same thing to feel like they aren't alone, that is true character.

A friend of mine, Matt Pipkin, was sexually assaulted when he was 5 years old. Just a child. A young boy. Many of you could never imagine such pain and suffering to hold something like that in for years and years. I can't even imagine it myself. However, he was finally able to open up about it two years ago and is doing really well!

The reason I'm writing about this is that he's flying for AT LEAST 65 days WITHOUT landing (world record) and somehow conned his dad to fly with him. Bathrooms and showers? Well, even I have no idea how that will work. The cool and most important part about this is the national platform he's flying for: childhood sexual abuse. 1 in 3 young girls and 1 in 6 young boys have been sexually assaulted prior to the age of 18. It's a serious problem and Matt has taken it upon himself to raise awareness to show others that if it happened to them, it's not their fault.

But he needs your help!! Share his story on facebook, twitter, to your family and friends. Watch him on the Today Show, follow his story as it unfolds. It's such an inspiring story and I want you all to get engaged!

The easiest thing for you to do is spread the word! If you feel so inclined to help financially, that would be amazing as well! He has 53 days left and needs to raise $50K. Every dollar counts!

Of course, I can't give justice to his story. Watch this short presentation to hear his story in his own words!

So get excited and help stop this national tragedy!

Visit http://commit365.org/ for more information.

Matt Pipkin

Twitter: @commit65 and @themattpipkin

Facebook: search “Commit 65”

Matt's email: purduepipkin@gmail.com

Matt is Boldly Challenging Status Quo. How about you?

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