I read an article the other morning about lasting relationships, which perfectly enough, I quoted in a conversation later that day. One of my students was having a bad day, not knowing why she would just all of a sudden start crying for no apparent reason. I told her to come find me if she needed to talk. I had a sneaky suspicion, but sometimes it’s hard for people to say things out loud because it makes it real. I know that all to well from my own personal relationships. But I also know that not talking about the things on our minds, the harder it is to logically think through the madness.
She showed up in my office a few hours later. We had our initial small talk session and then I went right into what was going on. I nailed it. She was having personal problems with her boy friend, but she didn’t want to really deal with them because she cares so much for him that she kept locking the frustrations away, only to finally break down “without any apparent reason.” The ever-present, yet constantly consciously forgotten, “Love is Blind” came into full swing. Why is it that so many people try to rationalize issues that will later destroy a relationship just because they remember “the good times?” Anyway, I pulled out the listed characteristics and gave it to her straight.
When considering a “soulmate,” you better have these characteristics figured out: