Finding Inspiration Again

It’s been awhile and don’t get me wrong - I’ve been inspired, but wow! The year has just blown by. I’ve been through my first year as an MBA student, been at Yelp through the wild ride it’s been, and even spent a month in Europe!

I was on such a high when I came back from Europe. The culture, the history, people, food - the list goes on. I was so inspired by what I saw and learned; I just couldn’t hide it upon return. But then, disaster struck and I dove way down. I was incredibly sad to not be in Europe any more, surrounded by about 50 people from across the world who also decided to take the MBA class like me.

There was no drama. At all! Weird? I thought so too, but we all clicked like we’d known each other for ages. You could morph into any group for meals, trips during the week, or long excursions on the weekends. I couldn’t have planned a more successful trip!

What am I missing here that makes me long for that again, or long for school to start up again? It’s people I’m surrounded with that inspire me, challenge me, and genuinely enjoy similar things as me (well mostly outdoor, crazy things!). Most of my close friends have munchkins, significant others, or partake in activities that are true to my character. Totally not judging and so love everyone of them, but I feel like I’m missing something.

Stop, Look & Listen

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Side note: My title makes me want to yell out in a cheer from high school! (Dedicated to my Wolf Pack!)

I get so annoyed with myself. When friends are stressed, heartbroken, unnerved, or frustrated with life, my heart literally aches for them and I can’t seem to get it off my mind. The motherly instinct kicks in (and I don’t even have kids yet!! Good grief!) and I just want to fix everything. I hate when I can’t help people, or fix problems. It’s the same reason why I hate when people are disappointed or mad at me, and I have no control over changing their opinion. Why is it that we have such deep bonds like this for our dearest friends and feel helpless when we can’t fix the pain, or why we go to any length to help those in need? But more so, why don’t we trust each other enough to be completely open and honest so those of us that want to fix it can pinpoint the problem!?

Simple answer. We’re human. Past experiences of others destroying our capability to trust others. The thought that others are judging us for being “weak” when pouring our hearts out. Because we have become a selfish public without genuine care or the art of listening. And because it becomes humorous when we struggle with ignorance. If you saw a man repeatedly running into a wall until he was a bloody pulp, after awhile it would make you laugh because it was so absurd. For this exact reason, we throw the wall up to relieve ourselves from embarrassment. It is unfortunate that we build walls so high and tough, that few people know how to break through. No one wants to get hurt, but life isn’t about being safe.

Ideas for Lasting Relationships

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I read an article the other morning about lasting relationships, which perfectly enough, I quoted in a conversation later that day. One of my students was having a bad day, not knowing why she would just all of a sudden start crying for no apparent reason. I told her to come find me if she needed to talk. I had a sneaky suspicion, but sometimes it’s hard for people to say things out loud because it makes it real. I know that all to well from my own personal relationships. But I also know that not talking about the things on our minds, the harder it is to logically think through the madness.

She showed up in my office a few hours later. We had our initial small talk session and then I went right into what was going on. I nailed it. She was having personal problems with her boy friend, but she didn’t want to really deal with them because she cares so much for him that she kept locking the frustrations away, only to finally break down “without any apparent reason.” The ever-present, yet constantly consciously forgotten, “Love is Blind” came into full swing. Why is it that so many people try to rationalize issues that will later destroy a relationship just because they remember “the good times?” Anyway, I pulled out the listed characteristics and gave it to her straight.

When considering a “soulmate,” you better have these characteristics figured out: